WOMEN EMPOWERMENT: start from your son’s upbringing
- IWB Post
- July 24, 2014
Can you recall any such instance when you have shirked your responsibilities on the grounds that it is a woman’s job? It might be small errands such as the washing of dishes after a meal or arranging the sofas in the right way, which are often taken for granted as chores that are solely the duty of women. We tend to completely ignore the fact that work has no gender and instead of taking a leaf out of the many western countries where self sufficiency is an irreplaceable part of life, a feeling of superiority is instilled in the mind of a boy from a very young age in our society.
The Ego Factor
The egoistical attitude of men which is seen often in the most trivial matters also needs to be discussed. When a man comes late from his office because of high workload he finds nothing wrong with it but when his wife does the same thing, then he can think of a thousand reasons to stop her from working. Similarly a woman is expected to head straight to the kitchen even after a hectic day of work just because she is a woman but the same does not apply for her husband. Another example is at the time of planning the career of their children parents put more priority on the sons while the daughters play second fiddle to them. There is an underlying assumption behind this practice that the sons will grow up to be the bread earners of the family, while the daughters will be married off to another family.
We spoke to a couple of mothers about what they believe as an ideal upbringing of boys and the steps they take to ensure that their sons learn the importance of gender equality. A teacher by profession, Mrs. Seema Singh tells us that she always gives emphasis on the principle of mutual cooperation in her house. She has taught her children to clear up after themselves and not to depend on others to do jobs which are technically their responsibility.
Another interviewee, Mrs. Parul Sharma, who is a housewife, believes that small lessons during a boy’s upbringing go a long way towards shaping his personality. She considers that an effective way to teach boys to be more self sufficient is by giving them choices between tasks. For example she always gives her son an option to choose between chores such as doing the laundry or cleaning up his room. This makes him feel to be in control of his life and more eager to do his own bidding.
A Few Ways to Teach Your Child to be Self Sufficient
- Role Model– By being good role models, parents can ensure great upbringing environment for their children. Remember, that the parents are the first people who constitute the world of a child. That’s why it is important that they conduct themselves in that manner. On the contrary, if a boy often witnesses his father speaking in an unjust manner with his mother or discrimination between him and his sister, then there are high chances that when he grows up he may turn out in the same mould.
- Communication– During the course of growing up, a boy may come across situations where he is confused. It happens frequently during the adolescence period. It is the duty of his parents to indulge in discussions with their ward and steer him towards the right direction. Repressing his queries or giving less attention to the matter will only give the wrong signal and disrupt their smooth growth.
- Checking Possessiveness– The bouts of possessiveness that are so common to men in our country are mostly because they have been taught from childhood the misconceptions that women are inferior to men and a man and woman can never be friends. If a boy is taught to look upon a girl as a taboo, then it will invariably result in dire consequences. Smooth interaction washes all these inhibitions away. When both genders are allowed to interact freely from a very young age, they tend to understand each other perfectly.
Merely worshipping women as goddesses in scriptures is futile if we refuse to give her an equal footing in the real life. Jaipur Women Blog fervently hopes that by introducing the ideals of freedom, equality and tolerance to the children during their upbringing, we might come across a time when the current social evils would no longer plague the next generation.
By Deep Mukherjee,