Marriage: Fellowship or Followship?
- IWB Post
- September 12, 2014
Few days back, my colleague and I were laughing at few habits of Indian husbands and the way Indian wives have accepted them. And then I went for a walk in Central Park (Jaipur) few days back for the 1st time. There, I noticed a ‘hilarious’ series of event. The wives were walking behind their husbands. Have I witnessed the truth?
You can find couples (generally, married and at times aged), walking together early in the morning. Not that the husband is strong and has no knee pain that he walks faster than her!
So why do our women walk behind their husbands while going for a walk.
Or for that matter, why men enter the restaurant before their wives and help themselves before pulling a chair for her?
I decided to do a little research on Google. I found blogs where people have shared their views about it. Glad few share the same concern. Someone wrote that women walk behind men because men naturally have a longer gait and may keep a faster pace than women. Ok, accepted.
The other exemplified Islam saying in this religion, men are given the responsibility as a protector and provider. The man walks in front of the woman to clear the way for a safe passage. Is it? Correct me, if I am wrong. Also, Wikipedia says the Bedouins men from Arab used walk in front of the women checking the sand and making sure there are no snakes and scorpions.
May be, it is an old age tradition where the husband or the man cuts through the crowd for his lady and gives her the comfort. Applauds. But dear men, isn’t she strong enough to push the resistance coming her way?
Here lies a funny irony. Though, we women walk behind men; we are, however, uncomfortable being followed by them. As my tradition goes, I quickly called up few known uncles and aunties to know their thoughts.
One plainly answered – “It is appropriate that the man walks in front of the woman.”
Later, he failed to explain this appropriateness.
Another uncle said – “In India, the husband is a symbol of Lord Vishnu and wife symbolizes Goddess Lakshmi. And, Lakshmi always follows Shiva. This is the tradition and we must follow it.”
Err…uncle my grandma sends you a weird look.
Finally, this aunty impressed me – “When it comes to a husband and wife nowadays, I see them walking side by side, holding hands. Why look at those who form rails?”
I want to know from YOU, why this tradition or habit has prevailed in our culture? Isn’t it time already the soul mates walk hand in hand? Let’s balance.
Meanwhile, will I get an Amen from ladies if I say – ‘Men are the red carpet for our women’! Xoxo
By Lavanya Bahuguna,